FAILURES AND WINS

 

Bear with me as I recall some things. I don't remember exactly how I felt January of 2016. I'm sure I was hopeful. I was probably like every other person on earth, with my list of goals (including eating right and losing weight). We're so starry-eyed when it comes to the new year. I know I've been. Every year for the past ten years I have always made resolutions.

NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS SUCK

A friend of mine has been saying it for some time, but I've just come to this revelation myself this year. I don't feel like looking up stats, but I'm sure way over half the people that made a list failed them by February. I know I did (I'm not sure the diet and exercise even really got started).

January 1st looks shiny and new doesn't it? It's a symbol of a new start. Clean slate.

 Not really.  

January 1st does not come with credit startovers. Your drug addiction will not magically disappear at 12 midnight. The same bill collector that called you on December 3rd will be calling you back on January 2nd demanding payment on an account you overdrafted in July. I'm not going to spend too much time on it, but you get it right?  You don't have to wait for the first of the year to start making changes. 

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I'm not trying to be a dark cloud over your resolutions. Make them! I'm only voicing what I learned, for the sake of myself:) 

My 2016 didn't go as I hoped. The first half of the year was filled with lots of book writing fear and procrastination, and probably one of the roughest financial years I've seen yet. Sure, I published a short story collection. But that was it!! I had plans for several other stories to be published.

I kept starting and stopping, and felt incompetent. Everytime I hit a wall, my mind would compare my lack of completing projects to that of a male who couldn't get it up (*shrug* I don't know. Then, a little later this year I found out that there is a female equivalent of not getting it up.) I digress. More on this in another post.

It wasn't ALL bad. In July, my curiosity for spreading the word for my book grew. I started following a social media guru by the name of John Erik. I read every post he wrote and watched every video he streamed live and learned a ton from him (He's AMAZING!). John not only taught me about adding value, he also boosted my confidence. What followed was the birth of a new curiosity: how to get known locally. This took much research.

ONLY 5 BOOKS THIS YEAR!  Cheap Seats was the best💕 

ONLY 5 BOOKS THIS YEAR!  Cheap Seats was the best💕 

For a long time I couldn't find what I was looking for. My writing had slowed dramatically (which I didn't mind since I was banging my head on the wall whenever I sat down to work) and I was obsessed with learning and searching. I was obsessed with learning social media, and I was obsessed with seeking resources to do readings and book signings and you know what? By September I was explaining to others how to cross-promote on social media, and I had 3 author appearances scheduled.

For me, September was my January 1st. 

All of that was good, but there was still a major setback. The writing. I still couldn't get it up. Couldn't perform. This was a huge problem. I didn't mind planning new stories. That was always fun. But getting the drafts done was difficult. Not because I couldn't sit down and write, but because there was an itch somewhere. 

That itch on your arm (or finger!) that's driving you crazy and no matter how hard you scratch, you just can't get to the mofo. Right?? Is it a bone itch?? Is that why I can't get to it?? 

Writing was just like that and has been for months and months. The only progress I'd made on figuring it out was earlier this year when I'd realized that it wasn't the ideas I had for the story. Something else. It was RIGHT THERE but I just couldn't for the life of me see it. 

WTH! 

Then, at the end of November, I figured it out. And I scratched the mess out of that itch! Meaning, I sat my behind down and planned. And wrote.

And it's been flowing.

I won't be talking about what I've been working on right now. That'll be the post come January 2nd.  This is the last post of the year, by the way (like that abruptness? I do that sometime). I hope your holidays are great. I hope you're surrounded by the people you love, and eat really good. I hope your spirits are up and that just being a good person in general is on your goal list, because we need more people being good people in 2017. 

Follow me on social media. I'm most active on Instagram and Twitter. I have snapchat too, but sometimes I forget to use it since IG stories are basically the same.

MTFBWY!